Waiting

Im waiting, and Im not really sure what for anymore.

Waiting for life to give up on me, I suppose.

It seems sometimes that you can work so hard, to get somewhere, and when you get there, you have no idea why you wanted to get there.

That’s how it seems.

Like life is laughing at me.

Taunting me.

And Im beginning to wonder, just how much I think is true, and how much I think really doesn’t matter.

Why did I want to be here, and where is here.

I try to avoid my thoughts, and I succeed.  Most times.  But sometimes, I cant avoid them anymore.

And they show up when I close my eyes, begging them to leave, as clear as day.

I don’t even know who I am anymore.

And I don’t think I will bother trying to figure that out anymore.

Im waiting.  And Im not sure why.

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